Unraveling

Work has been…well, crazy. We launched our new site (a complete overhaul) earlier this month. With that came a barrage of questions, complaints, and problems. When I started at shopkick, they had also just torn apart their app, so I’m used to users being upset about change.

That being said, the past three weeks have been especially tiring and stressful. It has been an uphill battle, and I’m always looking to the weekend. Now, this sounds terrible. But when I’m at work, I hop right to it. I don’t wake up dreading the massive amount of tickets. I’ve worked almost nine hours nearly every day. What has definitely helped is loosening up around co-workers. It doesn’t seem so tough when you can mouth off about an insulting email, rant about a bug, or laugh with others at the ridiculousness of it all. When a complete stranger tells you that you’re terrible at your job, it really helps to have some perspective.

The thing is, this is what we do. We clear up perceptions about the company and its services. We assuage upset members, irrational or rational. We find problems for the engineers to fix. And we fix things ourselves. And once in a while, members say thank you. They love the website, even the new features. They love that we respond within 3 business days.

And that rare token of appreciation overwhelms me.

Even when the members don’t have nice things to say, at least once a week, I’ll look around and feel a soaring inside of me. I feel proud of what we’re doing as a team and company. And I feel happy.

It’s sappy but honestly kind of foreign to me in a workplace. And isn’t it weird to be both stressed and satisfied? Whatever this is, I hope it lasts.

This is small addendum to my job search post, but it’s really important to me that I stand up for my search tactics. 90% of my interviews came from Craigslist listings. Yes, Craigslist! Even if the website isn’t the most efficient way to search for jobs, I loved Craigslist. They always have different companies (small and large) and jobs being reposted, so if you miss something, it can come back a few days later. 

I found Indeed the best for tracking keywords and finding listings from different job boards. Not much more to say.

Although I believe LinkedIn is important, I abhorred searching for jobs there and it only resulted in 3 interviews. They’ve made recent search changes, but that won’t change how little variety or personality lies in their postings. (Not LinkedIn the company’s fault.) There is just something so impersonal and formal about it, and it is really only best for certain industries. 

I got my job the way I wanted to: by perusing job boards daily. Not by networking, making cold emails, or signing up with a recruiting agency (the latter pushed by my parents). The day I applied to Credit Karma, I hadn’t visited Craigslist until that night. They had posted around 5, I applied around 8 and heard back around 10. Odd hours can be handy.

I’m not a networking girl. It would be inauthentic of me to try to connect with someone in 5 minutes in hopes of a job lead down the line. I barely knew what I wanted from my job search. How would a stranger know which opportunities to pass onto me? I think networking may be easier for me if I try to make new connections for the sake of making new connections.

So while job search articles can give you great advice (ALWAYS send a thank you note), do what’s most effective and comfortable for you.

(The Interview by Agent-X)

A year after I began my job search - a summer in New York - a remote contract job - and a sort-of career switch later…I will be joining the Credit Karma team as a Member Support Specialist next Tuesday! While I’m extremely excited, this post isn’t about the job. It’s about the issues I faced during the job search.

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Sometimes I am happy as a clam, pleased with my work.

Sometimes I am numb, bored with my routine and aching to get out.

Sometimes I am back in New York, curled up in a ball surrounded by crumpled tissues.

I am happy with my new home, happy to be living with my parents.

Happy to have reconnected with my best friend, even though I don’t get out much.

Happy to have the space to work in my pajamas and blast repetitive Pandora music.

But deep inside, I am still adjusting. I am still crying, calling up memories and making mistakes. I am still drifting from my past and fighting the growing space and silence as hard as I can. I am still fighting.

I am in that weird zone again where I do nothing but work. Where I allow myself to peek but not want, where I hold myself back.

Nothing to do but wait and let time do its thing.